Need help finding someone!!!!
12-30-2008, 02:11 PM
#1
Need help finding someone!!!! OK, so im going to try and not go into great detail, but also try and explain this the best i can... So my GF is currently separated, she has been trying to get a divorce with this guy for about a year now, but as of 3 months ago, he has dropped all comunication with her, and any other shared contacts. He moved from VA to PA and when he did, created a PO box, but has not given any indication to his currents address. He refused to sign the serving waver, so without his new address, he cannot be served, so the divorce is stopped.
NO PAPERS = NO DIVORCE
The guy is a real jackass, and has a control issue, he must be in control at all times. her leaving him, and then attempting to divorce him has put him in the passenger seat. so his response was to make it impossible for her to find him. My question to everone here is, what can she do to find this guy, or atleast find is current address? her lawyer told her there is nothing she can do except hire a PI. but both of us are under 25 yrs old, PIs arent cheap.
anyway, i figured there are people on here from ALL walks of life, i thought there may be somebody with some good advice, or maybe even been through a situation like this. Id love to just drive around PA looking for him, find him, and burry him 10 ft under in some amish backcountry. but even in PA they have laws against that.
NO PAPERS = NO DIVORCE
The guy is a real jackass, and has a control issue, he must be in control at all times. her leaving him, and then attempting to divorce him has put him in the passenger seat. so his response was to make it impossible for her to find him. My question to everone here is, what can she do to find this guy, or atleast find is current address? her lawyer told her there is nothing she can do except hire a PI. but both of us are under 25 yrs old, PIs arent cheap.
anyway, i figured there are people on here from ALL walks of life, i thought there may be somebody with some good advice, or maybe even been through a situation like this. Id love to just drive around PA looking for him, find him, and burry him 10 ft under in some amish backcountry. but even in PA they have laws against that.
12-30-2008, 03:08 PM
#2
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You have no idea where he is in PA? If you had a basic idea, I would start contacting the local police, and have them keep an eye out.
Unless you want to put his picture on here and have us PA members keep an eye out, I'm not sure what else to tell you!
Unless you want to put his picture on here and have us PA members keep an eye out, I'm not sure what else to tell you!
12-30-2008, 04:05 PM
#3
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Have the lawyer request (through the court) a supoena for the address of the PO Box holder through SUBPOENA DUCES TECUM (A command to a witness to produce documents) as this can be done through the Postmaster or Commercial Box Holder. Then, you can proceed....
12-30-2008, 07:07 PM
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you can do background checks on people online for a small fee. not sure how much it will bring up but should give you a current address atleast. or like said above call local or state police and keep a look out for him.
12-31-2008, 07:55 AM
#7
Thanks for the quick responses everyone.
We are pretty sure that the PO box is attatched to his Moms address, since she lives in PA as well. Apparently he had the PO box before they met. But she is gongi to write her lawyer an email anyway asking about it.
The PO box is located in Elizabethtown, 17022. Again, we think its attached to his moms place.
She is unwilling to help, or answer her phone either. Dont know what story he has told his family, but im sure it wasnt very flattering towards my GF.
She is unwilling to help, or answer her phone either. Dont know what story he has told his family, but im sure it wasnt very flattering towards my GF.
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12-31-2008, 07:58 AM
#8
If i contacted the local police, do i just tell them the situation? I havent ever delt with a smaller comunity police department. If i tried to tell the "local police" here in northern VA about something like this, they wouldnt give me the time of day.
12-31-2008, 11:08 AM
#9
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You could try to get the divorce through abandonment. It is a little more complicated to do, but can be done. You might also try to have his mom subpoenaed, as it sounds like he has contact with her.
12-31-2008, 11:21 AM
#10
a little update: I went online and purchased a background check on him. was able to find some addresses. with a little help from google and facebook, found out where he works. called the place and asked for him, said he wasnt in the office. Since we were able to confirm where he works, my gf sent her lawyer an email to see if we can serve his work, since he will be there everyday.
12-31-2008, 11:23 AM
#12
Thanks again everyone for the advice and ideas.
12-31-2008, 01:17 PM
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Sorry to say it, but you would get the exact same here. This is a civil matter, not criminal, so they are not going to put any time into trying to dig up info on this guy when they have no reason for involvement. You may get lucky and talk to an officer who has personal knowledge of the subject. This would be no problem to give out. But no one is going to run him or his vehicle, or check departmental records for a civil matter.
Hope everything works out for you,
Mike
12-31-2008, 01:20 PM
#15
Sorry to say it, but you would get the exact same here. This is a civil matter, not criminal, so they are not going to put any time into trying to dig up info on this guy when they have no reason for involvement. You may get lucky and talk to an officer who has personal knowledge of the subject. This would be no problem to give out. But no one is going to run him or his vehicle, or check departmental records for a civil matter.
Hope everything works out for you,
Mike
Hope everything works out for you,
Mike
01-26-2009, 06:57 PM
#18
Hey everyone, its been a crazy few weeks, but just wanted to give a little update. So during this time lots has happened. but the bottom line is this, we were able finally get the guy to sign the waiver, it arrived today in the mail. here is how it happened... so after many more talks with the lawyer, we discussed one option of having him subpoena'd to court. and since we knew he wouldnt show up, it would mean they would go to his house and arrest him for failure to show. so what we did was finally got in touch with his mom, and told her "if your son doesnt sign the papers, we will have him subpoena'd and arrested." next day my GF gets a text from him saying, where do you want me to send the papers? 1 week later we have signed papers.
Thanks to everyone for the advice and ideas. a lot of what was said here, i then brought up to my GF and she then asked her lawyer about.
Thanks to everyone for the advice and ideas. a lot of what was said here, i then brought up to my GF and she then asked her lawyer about.
