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Old 09-08-2011, 11:14 AM   #41
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Old 09-08-2011, 12:09 PM   #42
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This thread is full of win, because Chucks name is mentioned.
Chuck Norris will never use a straw.
The Stig is actually Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris' beard is made of carbon fibers
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Old 09-08-2011, 12:35 PM   #43
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Chuck Norris can speak braille

Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands, they are now known as the Islands
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Old 09-08-2011, 02:15 PM   #44
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Another Funny one for you magic nerds lol.
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You know the guy that comes up to you at a gas station, or party, or where ever, and trys to bs with you about your car, and trys to tell you about the car in his garage? The one that does 4's flat @ 460mph, and pops wheelies from an 80 roll. and it becomes apparent that he knows nothing about cars. Well, thats Rich.
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Old 09-08-2011, 02:27 PM   #45
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As much as I hate racial jokes, the last one made me bust out laughing in the middle of class!!
chuck norris punched them in the face, giving them black eyes. hence, "black eyed peas". he did not make them black lol
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I use my old face razors to shave my *****... A little moisturizing lotion afterwards may also help.
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Old 09-08-2011, 04:20 PM   #46
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Even the Lord does not say Chuck Norris' name in vain.
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Old 09-08-2011, 04:25 PM   #47
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Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
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Old 09-08-2011, 07:20 PM   #48
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Chuck Norris CAN eat just on Lay's potato chip.

If this one doesn't already exist, I take credit for making it up...until/unless Chuck Norris objects.
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Old 09-08-2011, 07:39 PM   #49
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Someone posted that one Ross. Chuck Norris is now standing behind you.
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Old 09-08-2011, 08:05 PM   #50
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you can't put ***** on a pedestal. manny pacquiao said he got this!
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Old 09-08-2011, 08:15 PM   #51
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Someone posted that one Ross. Chuck Norris is now standing behind you.

Damn it!

I thought I smelled adult diapers...I'm dead.
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Quote:
Originally Spoken By Roman Moroni
"You lousy corksuckers. You have violated my farging rights. Dis somanumbatching country was founded so that the liberties of common patriotic citizens like me could not be taken away by a bunch of fargin iceholes...like yourselves."
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Old 09-08-2011, 09:41 PM   #52
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some etch their name in the snow by peeing. Chuck Norris etches his name in concrete.
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Old 09-08-2011, 10:26 PM   #53
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Chuck Norris is not a keyboard warrior. He prefers to kill you with the mouse instead.
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Old 09-08-2011, 11:01 PM   #54
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When Chuck Norris bangs your mom, you die. It's science.
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Quote:
Originally Spoken By Roman Moroni
"You lousy corksuckers. You have violated my farging rights. Dis somanumbatching country was founded so that the liberties of common patriotic citizens like me could not be taken away by a bunch of fargin iceholes...like yourselves."
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Old 09-09-2011, 08:17 AM   #55
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Chuck Norris visited the Lincoln Memorial and Abe Lincoln offered him his seat.

Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet who can kick you in the back of the face.

Chuck Norris once broke a mirror on a black cat under a ladder on Friday the 13th. He won the lottery that day.

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris's PC will crash.

Objects in Chuck Norris's rearview mirror appear at their correct distances.
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Old 09-09-2011, 09:04 AM   #56
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Chuck Norris took and drank the beer from the Most Interesting Man in the World.
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Old 09-09-2011, 10:59 AM   #57
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Chuck Norris once lit a fart while camping in the Sahara forest.
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Old 09-09-2011, 11:24 AM   #58
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There are no such things as shooting stars. It's just victims of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick burning up in the atmosphere.
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Old 09-09-2011, 08:43 PM   #59
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Ill play. Chuck Norris does not need a ribbed condum, his ***** is lined with knuckles.

Once a month Chuck Norris has sex with every woman in the world, as a result they bleed for a week. lol
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Old 09-09-2011, 09:01 PM   #60
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He once had a awquard moment just to see how it felt.

He once punched a magician. Yah that's right you herd me!
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Old 09-09-2011, 09:01 PM
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