A joke about engineers
02-13-2007, 05:02 PM
#1
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A joke about engineers
A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer are milling around bored in a long hallway, when they are approached by a zen master. The zen master proposes a race: He says: "I'll offer eternal harmony to the one who can reach the end of the hallway first."
The three are about to charge off when the zen master finishes:
"There are two rules. First, you must move in turns. Second, on each move you can only travel at most half the remaining distance..."
The mathematician quickly points out: "Ha! Impossible, Mr. Zen master" and storms off muttering something about not quitting a day job.
The Physicist, likewise, muttering something about the impossibility of the race, stomps off red faced.
The engineer however, is already on his second move, and can be heard saying something about "close enough for me..."
The three are about to charge off when the zen master finishes:
"There are two rules. First, you must move in turns. Second, on each move you can only travel at most half the remaining distance..."
The mathematician quickly points out: "Ha! Impossible, Mr. Zen master" and storms off muttering something about not quitting a day job.
The Physicist, likewise, muttering something about the impossibility of the race, stomps off red faced.
The engineer however, is already on his second move, and can be heard saying something about "close enough for me..."
02-13-2007, 09:47 PM
#6
Originally Posted by Shackleford
I wonder how many mathematicians or physicists we have here. Heh.
<-- +1
To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later his company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine fixed, but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past.
The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day he marked an "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is." The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again.
The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his services. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded briefly:
One chalk mark..................$1
Knowing where to put it.........$49,999
It was paid in full and the engineer retired in peace.
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02-13-2007, 10:03 PM
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Originally Posted by TheBlurLS1
You mean engineering majors?
<-- +1
To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later his company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine fixed, but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past.
The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day he marked an "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is." The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again.
The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his services. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded briefly:
One chalk mark..................$1
Knowing where to put it.........$49,999
It was paid in full and the engineer retired in peace.
<-- +1
To the optimist, the glass is half full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later his company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else to get the machine fixed, but to no avail. In desperation, they called on the retired engineer who had solved so many of their problems in the past.
The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. He spent a day studying the huge machine. At the end of the day he marked an "x" in chalk on a particular component of the machine and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is." The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly again.
The company received a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his services. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded briefly:
One chalk mark..................$1
Knowing where to put it.........$49,999
It was paid in full and the engineer retired in peace.
02-13-2007, 10:34 PM
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Originally Posted by TheBlurLS1
Mechanical here. IE's have it easy, we call them "Imaginary Engineers". 
02-13-2007, 10:55 PM
#13
My dads a civil/structural engineer, worked for the last 40+ years, I dont think that guy will ever retire, his job is prety much his hobby now, I think he goes just to keep him self busy. He knows other engineers well in to their 80s that are still working, most those guys really like what they do and wont ever retire from it as long as their capable. Most the employers also take it really easy on them far as work loads and what not.
02-13-2007, 11:18 PM
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Originally Posted by BigBronco
Going back to ME here....
Boy do I NOT miss Fluids and Statics LOL
Boy do I NOT miss Fluids and Statics LOL
02-13-2007, 11:26 PM
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ME major here.
My physics teacher told me that joke last year, except they were all on an island, and whoever could get to the last coconut first by going 1/2 the way each time got it.
My physics teacher told me that joke last year, except they were all on an island, and whoever could get to the last coconut first by going 1/2 the way each time got it.
02-14-2007, 07:55 AM
#17
Originally Posted by pinesol_hater
Mech E & Aero E here..... can't say I miss those classes either.
Do you? 