A Firebird Worth Saving or a Fire-Pit?

Taste is a subjective, as evidenced by this modified Firebird.

Everyone has a difference perspective on what they think is a tastefully modded car. You’ll find that out of one-hundred people, you’ll likely get ninety to one-hundred different answers on the matter. However, when you ask someone what isn’t tastefully modified and show them, well, this Firebird, they’ll tell you this isn’t tastefully modified. We must agree because this poor car is rather unsightly.

Now, it isn’t like it’s not a clean car. Quite the opposite, it looks like it’s well taken care of. This is no rat but this F-body Firebird just doesn’t look good with the. The…What the heck is the interior even covered in? Is it a velour, and if so, why is it so wrinkly? If it was properly fitted, it could be better but would need to be a different color. Were they going with a similar theme of the cinder block mural on the hood? That also doesn’t make much sense because it’s only on the hood. Then the chrome finder extensions. Who in their right mind STILL puts those on their F-body? The wheels are, well, meh. It’s a classic American Racing Ventura but it’s a design that just hasn’t aged well. It’s aged so much like cheese that they don’t even offer it anymore.

Going back to the hood for a moment, how does that even work?

No, not how does it physically work but how does it work without bending at the headlight cutouts? Yeah, it works on the C5 Corvette, but the C5’s hood isn’t all steel like it is on the Firebird. Then again, looking at it this one might not be steel, either, since it has additional cutouts near the nose and the rear potions of it. The cowl has no wipers and is replaced with, more velour? Flocked cardboard, perhaps? We’re not sure on that one. Don’t get us started on the steering wheel, the pedal covers, or the blue zebra floor mats.

Okay, we looked at the bad but what’s good about it?

Well, from the surface, it is a clean and straight F-body with low mileage and most of the modifications look reversible. Though you may need a glove box thanks to that whatever is going on in there and down the center console. Other than the gaudy looking blue covers over the piping and the faux-steel radiator hoses, the engine doesn’t look too bad. It’s got a TH350 auto behind it, so it’s an OK transmission with the engine, probably a 305, and not a 350-cubic-inch V8. Honestly, if someone spent eight-thousand-dollars on this, Autozone or Pep Boys made some money off this guy but we doubt it’s close to that much. The most expensive looking thing on this car is that blue paint job and the mural.

Is it worth $5,600?

Maybe, but not for what’s been done to it. It is a thirty-one-year-old F-body chassis with an owner-claimed 75,000 miles. Take the horrible looking hood, interior, chrome over fenders, wheels, crap-tacular engine dressing, and you’re not left with much. You’re certainly going to spend a lot more to get it back to stock. Is it worth fifty-six-hundred after the work and parts you’re going to have to put back into it? We don’t feel like it is. Two grand or less? That might not be so bad.

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