So my marriage is over....
01-09-2009, 08:41 AM
#121
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I found out a few days after he went back home to IL. Can't say that he beats her but he spanks her, she says it hurts and wants him to stop. I would have been having a "discussion" if he was still around that day. I totally don't care who my ex goes out with, as long as she does right with the kids. Things were getting better with us last May/June. Or so I thought. Then I did some investigating and caught them on what they said was there first date. This was the end of July. 4-5 weeks later she is spending the night in a hotel with him... and our 3 kids. That was the 2nd or 3rd time that the kids had met him. Not cool! So much for not introducing the kids to anyone else for about a year. My oldest sees Mom and Dad house shopping one month and then Mom is with another guy shortly after. Hopefully she turns out ok.
01-09-2009, 09:20 AM
#122
I found out a few days after he went back home to IL. Can't say that he beats her but he spanks her, she says it hurts and wants him to stop. I would have been having a "discussion" if he was still around that day. I totally don't care who my ex goes out with, as long as she does right with the kids. Things were getting better with us last May/June. Or so I thought. Then I did some investigating and caught them on what they said was there first date. This was the end of July. 4-5 weeks later she is spending the night in a hotel with him... and our 3 kids. That was the 2nd or 3rd time that the kids had met him. Not cool! So much for not introducing the kids to anyone else for about a year. My oldest sees Mom and Dad house shopping one month and then Mom is with another guy shortly after. Hopefully she turns out ok.
Holy crap!! Some people are so clueless as to whats good for their kids' mentality during and after a divorce.
On the spanking part, that's better than beating, but still, I would never spank another man's kid unless there was an understanding with HIM that I was a disiplinary figure in her life. OH MAN I'M FIRED UP and I don't even have kids lol. I hope to God I'm never in a situation that I have a kid and the mother isn't my wife for whatever reason, but if someone else spanks my kids.......oh man!! It's bad enough having younger siblings, especially sisters. I'll probably be "talking" to a couple of my sisters's ex bfs next time I run into them.
01-09-2009, 07:02 PM
#124
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I think people work harder to keep the other person happy when they aren't married. No problem with one of them leaving the relationship then. I think after couples get married, they let themselves go and don't do all of the little things that got them together and made them happy. When divorce time comes, they usually hate eachother.
Take my case, I recently found that my soon to be ex's boyfriend hits my 10 year old daughter. The ex allows him to disipline her like that. I don't hit my kids and after far as I know, she doesn't either so there is no reason for an outsider to do it. I'll try letting the law take care of it first.
Take my case, I recently found that my soon to be ex's boyfriend hits my 10 year old daughter. The ex allows him to disipline her like that. I don't hit my kids and after far as I know, she doesn't either so there is no reason for an outsider to do it. I'll try letting the law take care of it first.
01-09-2009, 07:42 PM
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Well, my daughter told me that "mommy told her that she needed to talk to her and it was very important" back in November. From what I was told, he was supposidly goofing around and slapped my daughter on the butt. Does the same with my ex. I took as something minor and my wife making sure everything was ok. I did speak with my daughter's counselor at school. She talked to my daughter to make sure there was nothing going on. Jump to this past weekend, my daughter was out with a close friend of mine. They got to talking about the holidays and the b/f being here. My friend asked how she liked he. She said he's nice but she doesn't like when he hits her. It hurts. Well, I found out pretty quick about that but he was already gone. The guy is a truck driver from IL.
I contacted my daughter's school on Monday. This way the counselor could talk to her. I also spoke with her after I picked her up on Wednesday. In a nutshell, she said that he spanks her if she doesn't clean her room or take a shower when she is told. I stopped by the local police after I dropped them off that night. Ran it by an officer who ended up going down there to speak with my ex and daughter. The ex said he asked about disciplining the children and she said it's ok. She also told the officer that she was in the room when he spanked her for not taking a shower. They only mentioned one incident but there was more. In the end, the officer didn't see much wrong with this. I don't understand that.
Spoke with my daughter's counselor on Thursday. She can no longer take to me about my daughter. I guess my ex was upset up the police coming to see her so she's trying to block me from getting info.
There are a whole lot of agencies involved now! And if someone doesn't take care of this, you won't see me on the boards anymore. Maybe on CNN, but not on the boards...
And for my little ones, they are 2 (twins). I asked my daughter if he hits them. She said "not really". I told her that I needed a clean answer. She said that he sometimes taps them on the hands or he'll yell at them and they will cry.
Something will be done. This won't be going on.
I contacted my daughter's school on Monday. This way the counselor could talk to her. I also spoke with her after I picked her up on Wednesday. In a nutshell, she said that he spanks her if she doesn't clean her room or take a shower when she is told. I stopped by the local police after I dropped them off that night. Ran it by an officer who ended up going down there to speak with my ex and daughter. The ex said he asked about disciplining the children and she said it's ok. She also told the officer that she was in the room when he spanked her for not taking a shower. They only mentioned one incident but there was more. In the end, the officer didn't see much wrong with this. I don't understand that.
Spoke with my daughter's counselor on Thursday. She can no longer take to me about my daughter. I guess my ex was upset up the police coming to see her so she's trying to block me from getting info.
There are a whole lot of agencies involved now! And if someone doesn't take care of this, you won't see me on the boards anymore. Maybe on CNN, but not on the boards...
And for my little ones, they are 2 (twins). I asked my daughter if he hits them. She said "not really". I told her that I needed a clean answer. She said that he sometimes taps them on the hands or he'll yell at them and they will cry.
Something will be done. This won't be going on.
Last edited by tbyrne; 01-09-2009 at 09:14 PM.
01-10-2009, 08:12 AM
#127
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Well, my daughter told me that "mommy told her that she needed to talk to her and it was very important" back in November. From what I was told, he was supposidly goofing around and slapped my daughter on the butt. Does the same with my ex. I took as something minor and my wife making sure everything was ok. I did speak with my daughter's counselor at school. She talked to my daughter to make sure there was nothing going on. Jump to this past weekend, my daughter was out with a close friend of mine. They got to talking about the holidays and the b/f being here. My friend asked how she liked he. She said he's nice but she doesn't like when he hits her. It hurts. Well, I found out pretty quick about that but he was already gone. The guy is a truck driver from IL.
I contacted my daughter's school on Monday. This way the counselor could talk to her. I also spoke with her after I picked her up on Wednesday. In a nutshell, she said that he spanks her if she doesn't clean her room or take a shower when she is told. I stopped by the local police after I dropped them off that night. Ran it by an officer who ended up going down there to speak with my ex and daughter. The ex said he asked about disciplining the children and she said it's ok. She also told the officer that she was in the room when he spanked her for not taking a shower. They only mentioned one incident but there was more. In the end, the officer didn't see much wrong with this. I don't understand that.
Spoke with my daughter's counselor on Thursday. She can no longer take to me about my daughter. I guess my ex was upset up the police coming to see her so she's trying to block me from getting info.
There are a whole lot of agencies involved now! And if someone doesn't take care of this, you won't see me on the boards anymore. Maybe on CNN, but not on the boards...
And for my little ones, they are 2 (twins). I asked my daughter if he hits them. She said "not really". I told her that I needed a clean answer. She said that he sometimes taps them on the hands or he'll yell at them and they will cry.
Something will be done. This won't be going on.
I contacted my daughter's school on Monday. This way the counselor could talk to her. I also spoke with her after I picked her up on Wednesday. In a nutshell, she said that he spanks her if she doesn't clean her room or take a shower when she is told. I stopped by the local police after I dropped them off that night. Ran it by an officer who ended up going down there to speak with my ex and daughter. The ex said he asked about disciplining the children and she said it's ok. She also told the officer that she was in the room when he spanked her for not taking a shower. They only mentioned one incident but there was more. In the end, the officer didn't see much wrong with this. I don't understand that.
Spoke with my daughter's counselor on Thursday. She can no longer take to me about my daughter. I guess my ex was upset up the police coming to see her so she's trying to block me from getting info.
There are a whole lot of agencies involved now! And if someone doesn't take care of this, you won't see me on the boards anymore. Maybe on CNN, but not on the boards...
And for my little ones, they are 2 (twins). I asked my daughter if he hits them. She said "not really". I told her that I needed a clean answer. She said that he sometimes taps them on the hands or he'll yell at them and they will cry.
Something will be done. This won't be going on.
I dont know, maybe its just me but.. The whole spanking thing is just way beyond me. Honestly when my mom wanted to settle down me and my brother (we were bastards) Shed just bust out the wooden spoon and beat us. But that was my mother an that was the 90s. we live in the year 2009 now, Who the **** spanks anymore? I think my daughter would kno if i used a diffrent tone in my voice that i was serious. I would never ever, ever. Even to my own daughter "spank" ive seen too many episodes of law and order svu to kno where that **** goes. But in your situation. I think you've done what you've had to do. Im sure the mothers really embrassed that you went to the school, and the local authorites. But as im reading your post again. Who the **** slaps lil girls on the *** "goofing" around? i dont think i know a single creepy family memeber that would even try pulling that **** around me or my daughter. Id honestly would drop that person with one punch, family member or not that **** is weird, Sry for getting so off subject but this little thing you have going on tbyrne has me fired up. I also wanted to say in my last post is thats a bitching 2500 hd you got in your avitar, im hopeing to grab an ol 2002 chevy 2500 hd 8.1 with 8 foot plow, same color as yours soon hopefully.
01-10-2009, 08:38 AM
#128
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I'm late as usual. Sorry to hear about the bad news. Not going to get into what happened or who's fault it was, but the good thing is your at the age to go younger or enjoy some cougar time.
Me and some guys from work are going to Buffalo WW in HP Tues. 1/13 to pound some beer and chix bosses treat for us.
Me and some guys from work are going to Buffalo WW in HP Tues. 1/13 to pound some beer and chix bosses treat for us.
01-12-2009, 12:40 AM
#129
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The concept is flawed to begin with aside for a few, very few exceptions.
There are just too many things working against you when you are with the same person for a long period of time. Boredom is the biggest I think. Unless both people are willing to do what is nessesary to keep the relationship fresh, it is doomed to failure from the word "go".
Kenny and Steph tried to work things out, but in the end, they were unable to solve their problems. Talking to Kenny now, he seems infinatly more happy then he was in the past and I could nto be happier for him.
There are just too many things working against you when you are with the same person for a long period of time. Boredom is the biggest I think. Unless both people are willing to do what is nessesary to keep the relationship fresh, it is doomed to failure from the word "go".
Kenny and Steph tried to work things out, but in the end, they were unable to solve their problems. Talking to Kenny now, he seems infinatly more happy then he was in the past and I could nto be happier for him.
01-19-2009, 09:13 PM
#130
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So sorry to hear that Kenny. I only met you a few times at Atco but have known Steph since she was a little girl on the beach at IBSP playing with my kids while I was fishing with her dad Steve. You will know if it was meant to be after you two have been separated for about a year. Just as a point of interest, my uncle married the same woman three times during the course of their lifetime and it finally lasted until one of them died at old age., so you never know.....
A quick note for Tom.......that guy would be picking up the newspaper in the morning with plastic clothspins attached to two stumps where his hands used to be if he ever touched my kids in any way. A good lawyer ought to be able to get them away from your boneheaded X and custody to you just on that alone.
Mickey
98 Black Z28 427 solid roller , Jerico DR4 , 4.56 spooled 12 bolt
06 GMC 2500HD Duramax Allison ext. cab pickup + 24' Featherlite
2009 Audi R8 Ibis white , Black leather int. 6M
A quick note for Tom.......that guy would be picking up the newspaper in the morning with plastic clothspins attached to two stumps where his hands used to be if he ever touched my kids in any way. A good lawyer ought to be able to get them away from your boneheaded X and custody to you just on that alone.
Mickey
98 Black Z28 427 solid roller , Jerico DR4 , 4.56 spooled 12 bolt
06 GMC 2500HD Duramax Allison ext. cab pickup + 24' Featherlite
2009 Audi R8 Ibis white , Black leather int. 6M
01-21-2009, 10:33 AM
#131
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Well, my daughter told me that "mommy told her that she needed to talk to her and it was very important" back in November. From what I was told, he was supposidly goofing around and slapped my daughter on the butt. Does the same with my ex. I took as something minor and my wife making sure everything was ok. I did speak with my daughter's counselor at school. She talked to my daughter to make sure there was nothing going on. Jump to this past weekend, my daughter was out with a close friend of mine. They got to talking about the holidays and the b/f being here. My friend asked how she liked he. She said he's nice but she doesn't like when he hits her. It hurts. Well, I found out pretty quick about that but he was already gone. The guy is a truck driver from IL.
I contacted my daughter's school on Monday. This way the counselor could talk to her. I also spoke with her after I picked her up on Wednesday. In a nutshell, she said that he spanks her if she doesn't clean her room or take a shower when she is told. I stopped by the local police after I dropped them off that night. Ran it by an officer who ended up going down there to speak with my ex and daughter. The ex said he asked about disciplining the children and she said it's ok. She also told the officer that she was in the room when he spanked her for not taking a shower. They only mentioned one incident but there was more. In the end, the officer didn't see much wrong with this. I don't understand that.
Spoke with my daughter's counselor on Thursday. She can no longer take to me about my daughter. I guess my ex was upset up the police coming to see her so she's trying to block me from getting info.
There are a whole lot of agencies involved now! And if someone doesn't take care of this, you won't see me on the boards anymore. Maybe on CNN, but not on the boards...
And for my little ones, they are 2 (twins). I asked my daughter if he hits them. She said "not really". I told her that I needed a clean answer. She said that he sometimes taps them on the hands or he'll yell at them and they will cry.
Something will be done. This won't be going on.
I contacted my daughter's school on Monday. This way the counselor could talk to her. I also spoke with her after I picked her up on Wednesday. In a nutshell, she said that he spanks her if she doesn't clean her room or take a shower when she is told. I stopped by the local police after I dropped them off that night. Ran it by an officer who ended up going down there to speak with my ex and daughter. The ex said he asked about disciplining the children and she said it's ok. She also told the officer that she was in the room when he spanked her for not taking a shower. They only mentioned one incident but there was more. In the end, the officer didn't see much wrong with this. I don't understand that.
Spoke with my daughter's counselor on Thursday. She can no longer take to me about my daughter. I guess my ex was upset up the police coming to see her so she's trying to block me from getting info.
There are a whole lot of agencies involved now! And if someone doesn't take care of this, you won't see me on the boards anymore. Maybe on CNN, but not on the boards...
And for my little ones, they are 2 (twins). I asked my daughter if he hits them. She said "not really". I told her that I needed a clean answer. She said that he sometimes taps them on the hands or he'll yell at them and they will cry.
Something will be done. This won't be going on.
tough it out stay on them.. call DCF they are much much more of a child advocte then anyone else would be.
call and talk to these guys..
Child Abuse and Neglect
The Department of Children and Families (DCF) is the Massachusetts state agency responsible for protecting children from child abuse and neglect. To report abuse or neglect, call the Child-at-Risk Hotline anytime of the day or night at 800-792-5200.
01-21-2009, 07:37 PM
#132
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Sorry to hear. I too dont know you either but have been through a divorce. I only lasted 4 yrs and it was a terrible last year of it. I was into cars more then him and he pretty much put me down for that. He was abusive and a loser besides the not liking me into cars. I am on the opposite side here because I got a T/A (sold my 94 Firebird while I was seperated) out of my divorce from selling my house. I am sad I sold my house which my Grandfather built and my mom grew up in as well but I had no other choice. I even had to move to another state to get away from the ex. Still to this day he's a miserable rotten person and hateful......5 yrs later!
Good luck to you. Like everyone else says it does get better with time and things happen for a reason. Something better will come to you one day! Oh and dont sell your car unless you absolutely have to.
Good luck to you. Like everyone else says it does get better with time and things happen for a reason. Something better will come to you one day! Oh and dont sell your car unless you absolutely have to.
01-21-2009, 07:38 PM
#133
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Hey Kenny, I am so sorry this happened. You both seem like good folks so I hope things go as smoothly as possible. I do believe everything happens for a reason, no matter how much it may suck at the time.
Oh and getting that new C6 down the road wouldn't hurt
I hope things turn around for you soon.
Oh and getting that new C6 down the road wouldn't hurt
I hope things turn around for you soon.
Hopefully that 'road' isn't too long as I'm itching for a C6....bad
I'm just as bit worried about selling the house, the market is aweful.
01-21-2009, 07:40 PM
#134
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sorry for the missfortune Kenny but it's all a matter of time before the hurt goes away and ya move on.
i tell my wife all the time...even before we got married....ill try anything once. if this doesnt work out, i dont think i can even do it again. too much time and energy wasted for nothing. hopefully i wont have to find out what divorce feels like but i do understand that the odds are against us. only thing i can do is try my hardest not to **** her off.
i tell my wife all the time...even before we got married....ill try anything once. if this doesnt work out, i dont think i can even do it again. too much time and energy wasted for nothing. hopefully i wont have to find out what divorce feels like but i do understand that the odds are against us. only thing i can do is try my hardest not to **** her off.
I don't mean to sound callous or unfeeling but at this point I can't say their is much hurt left. I honestly feel this was the right move for me and for her. I wish her the best, I certainly want her to be happy and have the best life possible. I'm not bitter towards her in anyway. It didn't work out, simple as that. As for right now, I am getting aclimated to being single and I'm not complaining about it.
01-21-2009, 07:45 PM
#135
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So sorry to hear that Kenny. I only met you a few times at Atco but have known Steph since she was a little girl on the beach at IBSP playing with my kids while I was fishing with her dad Steve. You will know if it was meant to be after you two have been separated for about a year. Just as a point of interest, my uncle married the same woman three times during the course of their lifetime and it finally lasted until one of them died at old age., so you never know.....
People tell me how frequently couples get back together but I don't think thats in the cards here. I never say never but I just don't think thats going to happen. I think we are both better off apart and living separate lives. Of course a part of me will always love her, how could I not after 8 years? But that doesn't mean we should be husband & wife either and it doesn't mean we both aren't better off in in different situations.
01-21-2009, 08:00 PM
#136
Sux to hear Kenny! Thats the reason Im 31 and never married, My current GF of 3 yrs and still cant bring myself to ask her, and I just dont see it happening in the future either.
Previous GF of 8yrs was perfect but I fucked that up and thought the grass was greener on the other side. Although I know she still loves me.
Anyways your an *** and got my mind wandering now! LOL!
In anycase forget her and see if you can get ahold of the girl on the right in the back of the pic! She looks pretty hot and will take your mind off things for awhile!!!! Plus she was at this "amazing wedding" she prob already has a thing for ya!!LOL! JK!
Previous GF of 8yrs was perfect but I fucked that up and thought the grass was greener on the other side. Although I know she still loves me.
Anyways your an *** and got my mind wandering now! LOL!
In anycase forget her and see if you can get ahold of the girl on the right in the back of the pic! She looks pretty hot and will take your mind off things for awhile!!!! Plus she was at this "amazing wedding" she prob already has a thing for ya!!LOL! JK!
01-22-2009, 05:07 AM
#137
....that's grounds for immediate deletion from my AIM list! 
01-22-2009, 07:11 AM
#138
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Wow, i missed alot.
To the spanking issue, be careful not to threaten the guy, could end up never seeing your kids again. if you want to make it clear, keep your cool and tell him to knock it the **** off, but dont threaten him.
To kenny, never met you man but i think a Camry S type R with a wings west body kit would be perfect for you. But for real, a new C6 or C6Z will have you forgetting about her in no time bro.
To the spanking issue, be careful not to threaten the guy, could end up never seeing your kids again. if you want to make it clear, keep your cool and tell him to knock it the **** off, but dont threaten him.
To kenny, never met you man but i think a Camry S type R with a wings west body kit would be perfect for you.
But for real, a new C6 or C6Z will have you forgetting about her in no time bro. 