Idiots of 2006
Thread Starter
Launching!
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 290
Likes: 0
From: Monroe, WA
Idiots of 2006 Number One Idiot of 2006
I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.
Here's your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Number Two Idiot of 2006
Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them. It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing.
Here's your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint might run.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Number Three Idiot of 2006
A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the branch and wrote, "this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note
because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK" and left.
He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.
Don't bother with this guy's sign. He probably couldn't read it anyway.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Number Four Idiot of 2006
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of pa yment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40.
Smart, but you still get a sign
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Number Five Idiot of 2006
A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him. At this point, the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot.
The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.
This guy definitely needs a sign.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Idiot Number Six of 2006
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.
This guy doesn't even deserve a sign.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Idiot Number Seven of 2006
Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him unconscious. It seems the l iquor store window was made of plexi-glass.
The whole event was caught on videotape. Yep, here's your sign.
Originally Posted by Rokko
When I saw him climbing the ladder to get out, I was like "No way,hes not going to fall again is he?!?!" He must have been on some good stuff to feel no pain. Trending Topics
LS1 Tech Stories
The Best V8 Stories One Small Block at Time
Gas Monkey Built a 6-Wheel Ferrari Testarossa With a Corvette LT4 Engine
Verdad Gallardo
7 Most Reliable High-Performance Engines GM Has Ever Built
Verdad Gallardo
Amazing '71 Camaro Restomod Is Modern Muscle Car Under the Skin
Verdad Gallardo
6 Common C5 Corvette Failures and What's Involved In Repairing Them
Pouria Savadkouei
Retro Modern Bandit Pontiac Trans AM Comes With Burt Reynolds' Autograph
Verdad Gallardo
Top 10 Greatest Cadillac V Series Performance Models Ever, Ranked
Pouria Savadkouei
Top 10 Most Powerful Chevy Trucks Ever Made!
Hennessey's New Supercharged Silverado ZR2 Has 700 HP
Verdad Gallardo
Coachbuilt N2A Anteros Is an LS2-Powered C6 Corvette In Italian Clothes
Verdad Gallardo
TECH Addict
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,563
Likes: 0
From: Seattle, WA
When I worked for Seafirst Bank Corporate Security in the early '90s there was an ATTEMPTED robery that took place one Friday afternoon. The FBI had 2 floors of one of the buildings Seafirst owned downtown and it happened to be payday for them. Just about every FBI agent on those two floors was at the bank on the first floor when in comes this guy thinking he's going to rob the bank. It took all of 2 seconds for this guy to have every federal gun in the Seattle pointed at him. Talk about bad timing.
Originally Posted by howierd42
When I worked for Seafirst Bank Corporate Security in the early '90s there was an ATTEMPTED robery that took place one Friday afternoon. The FBI had 2 floors of one of the buildings Seafirst owned downtown and it happened to be payday for them. Just about every FBI agent on those two floors was at the bank on the first floor when in comes this guy thinking he's going to rob the bank. It took all of 2 seconds for this guy to have every federal gun in the Seattle pointed at him. Talk about bad timing.
Ya, they both should have a sign.
Mike
Snopes.com says this about the boeing life raft:
"We've been finding the "Boeing employees" variant on the Internet since 1997. Those tempted to allow for the possibility that it might be true should consider that there is no emergency locator transmitter (ELT) in the life raft or slide/raft on 747s. (If the story were about a 777 slide/raft it could be more believable, as the 777 does have the option packing ELTs into the slide/raft. Recently the 767 has had this option too, but only one customer has opted for it so far. In all cases, ELTs are triggered not by inflation of the raft, but by getting wet.)"
"We've been finding the "Boeing employees" variant on the Internet since 1997. Those tempted to allow for the possibility that it might be true should consider that there is no emergency locator transmitter (ELT) in the life raft or slide/raft on 747s. (If the story were about a 777 slide/raft it could be more believable, as the 777 does have the option packing ELTs into the slide/raft. Recently the 767 has had this option too, but only one customer has opted for it so far. In all cases, ELTs are triggered not by inflation of the raft, but by getting wet.)"
Thread Starter
Launching!
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 290
Likes: 0
From: Monroe, WA
Originally Posted by TwoFast4Lv
AND married him again!
Good thing to. Who else would have him
Good thing to. Who else would have him
TECH Veteran
iTrader: (3)
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 4,729
Likes: 0
From: Lynnwood, WA (North of Seattle)
Originally Posted by 1970camaroRS
Snopes.com says this about the boeing life raft:
"We've been finding the "Boeing employees" variant on the Internet since 1997. Those tempted to allow for the possibility that it might be true should consider that there is no emergency locator transmitter (ELT) in the life raft or slide/raft on 747s. (If the story were about a 777 slide/raft it could be more believable, as the 777 does have the option packing ELTs into the slide/raft. Recently the 767 has had this option too, but only one customer has opted for it so far. In all cases, ELTs are triggered not by inflation of the raft, but by getting wet.)"
"We've been finding the "Boeing employees" variant on the Internet since 1997. Those tempted to allow for the possibility that it might be true should consider that there is no emergency locator transmitter (ELT) in the life raft or slide/raft on 747s. (If the story were about a 777 slide/raft it could be more believable, as the 777 does have the option packing ELTs into the slide/raft. Recently the 767 has had this option too, but only one customer has opted for it so far. In all cases, ELTs are triggered not by inflation of the raft, but by getting wet.)"
The one about the cinder block into a plexiglass window is actually on a security video they show on those stupidest criminal shows and what not. Knocks him the **** out!!!
Originally Posted by TL00CamaroSS
Oh man When I saw him climbing the ladder to get out, I was like "No way,hes not going to fall again is he?!?!" He must have been on some good stuff to feel no pain.
When I saw him climbing the ladder to get out, I was like "No way,hes not going to fall again is he?!?!" He must have been on some good stuff to feel no pain.