Worst first date story ever
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From: Seabrook, TX
Worst first date story ever If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope
you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably
the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have
all had bad dates but this takes the cake.
Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most
embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner
described her worst first date experience.
There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took
the prize!
She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold... and
the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt
Lake City , Utah .
It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers,
after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but
relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that
afternoon.
They were driving back down the mountain, when she
gr adually began to realize that she should not have had that
extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with
a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion
suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while.
Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going,
there came a point where she told him that he had better
stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the
front seat of his car
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,
yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she
didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest
against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion
stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed
was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she
could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather
embarrassing nature of the situation.
Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another
sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady
discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the
car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles
immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her
flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she
had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the
moment, she answered her date's concerns about' what
is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was
'freezing her butt off' and in need of some
assistance! He came around the car as she tried to cover
herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly
into his eyes, he burst out l aughing. She too, got the
giggles and when they finally managed
to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also
were faced with a real problem.
Both agreed it would take some thing hot to free her chilly
cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what
had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both
quickly realized that there was only one way to get her
free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date
proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the
fender.
As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight
Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants
down. 'And you thought your first date was embarrassing.
Jay Leno's comment...'This gives a whole new meaning
to being pissed off.'
Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her
husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.
If you laughed at this pass it on.
you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably
the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have
all had bad dates but this takes the cake.
Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most
embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner
described her worst first date experience.
There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took
the prize!
She said it was midwinter...Snowing and quite cold... and
the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt
Lake City , Utah .
It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers,
after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but
relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that
afternoon.
They were driving back down the mountain, when she
gr adually began to realize that she should not have had that
extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with
a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion
suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while.
Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going,
there came a point where she told him that he had better
stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the
front seat of his car
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,
yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she
didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest
against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion
stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed
was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she
could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather
embarrassing nature of the situation.
Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another
sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady
discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the
car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles
immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her
flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she
had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the
moment, she answered her date's concerns about' what
is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was
'freezing her butt off' and in need of some
assistance! He came around the car as she tried to cover
herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly
into his eyes, he burst out l aughing. She too, got the
giggles and when they finally managed
to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.
Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also
were faced with a real problem.
Both agreed it would take some thing hot to free her chilly
cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what
had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both
quickly realized that there was only one way to get her
free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date
proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the
fender.
As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight
Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants
down. 'And you thought your first date was embarrassing.
Jay Leno's comment...'This gives a whole new meaning
to being pissed off.'
Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her
husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.
If you laughed at this pass it on.
This is not my story but it was a fwd email post from this forum (below) 
I kept the email since it was some of the funniest **** ever literally lol link is below the story, it's pretty funny so make sure to read it all, dont A.D.D.-out throught half the story 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wow, so this has to be the most embarassing thing i have ever heard and experienced in my life. I can't imagine how she feels at this point... I need some advice here, because i really don't know what to say...
So, i just met this girl. We went on one date and it went great. A lot of talking, good communication. She is 19. Honestly, all i have seen is good until this point. She is in school, full time with a job, good parents, has a car, all good things.
It starts here. I'm into fitness and like to eat right and keep my cut look. She used to run a lot and be very active. Although, about 2 months ago she started a birth control that she claims made her gain about 20lbs, so she just layed off it, because she wants to lose all that weight! So, now she has a few extra pounds in her stomach, but she isn't bad. She cheered in a professional football game about a year ago, so she had a very good body and still has a very pretty face and perfect teeth. So, since she is trying to eat healthy and is running, this makes her good for me, because she can run with me and eat healthy without us arguing over crap like that...I can't deal with some girls that force me to eat out all the time...(referring to bad food) I figure she would be a good thing!
So, she asked me if she could run with me at night. I said sure. So, i drove to her house, she is about 10mins away. We started the jog and after about 30mins i could tell she was getting tired and we stopped for a min and walked. We went to a water fountain, she got some water, then started a slow jog again after we were rested. (PREPARE YOURSELF) Everything was fine, but about 6mins later she said she was cramping a little, so she wanted to walk. I was fine with it, we already jogged a good 30mins, nothing wrong with walking and talking. So, we were walking slow for about 15mins and having an awesome conversation, then all of a sudden she says: "Oh, my stomach hurts bad, i feel like i'm going to poop or something!!!" I was thinking to myself, ummm, what?? So, she bends over instantly and actually starts pooping in the street! It just happened, through her shorts, disgusting/embarassing! I handled it very well, i asked if she was ok and she kept saying how embarassed she was and how she felt like crying. I told her their was nothing to be embarrased about and not to get upset about it. I cheered her up, we walked back and i let her go inside to her parents and sister...I told her to say that we parted ways, and i didn't see it happen. To save her embarassment...
Ok, so ****? I can't really figure out how this can happen to someone. I'm going to give you a brief summary of the things i know she ate. I know she had sushi, about 2 hours or less prior to the jog. I thought maybe that could have been it. Also, i know she is taking these 7 day diet pills or something. Maybe that caused it? Although, if it was the pills, you would think it would have happened before. It's not like her first day taking them was today...
I'm not sure how to handle this, because i know when i talk to her tomorrow she is going to be upset and embarassed. I mean, i have never heard of this...This was our 2nd date, lol...I know she thinks i'm gone, but i don't think i should just not date her because of this. Although, if that happened to her, do you think she may have other weird problems? For instance, if we were sexual she would pee or something...I mean, i don't know if i could handle all that, lol...I also want to make sure this isn't something that will happen often, because i don't know if i could deal with that...What could it be?
So, what do you all think? Give her another chance, or just move on because it was gross and who knows what could be wrong...
----------------
http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=243484
I kept the email since it was some of the funniest **** ever literally lol link is below the story, it's pretty funny so make sure to read it all, dont A.D.D.-out throught half the story -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wow, so this has to be the most embarassing thing i have ever heard and experienced in my life. I can't imagine how she feels at this point... I need some advice here, because i really don't know what to say...
So, i just met this girl. We went on one date and it went great. A lot of talking, good communication. She is 19. Honestly, all i have seen is good until this point. She is in school, full time with a job, good parents, has a car, all good things.
It starts here. I'm into fitness and like to eat right and keep my cut look. She used to run a lot and be very active. Although, about 2 months ago she started a birth control that she claims made her gain about 20lbs, so she just layed off it, because she wants to lose all that weight! So, now she has a few extra pounds in her stomach, but she isn't bad. She cheered in a professional football game about a year ago, so she had a very good body and still has a very pretty face and perfect teeth. So, since she is trying to eat healthy and is running, this makes her good for me, because she can run with me and eat healthy without us arguing over crap like that...I can't deal with some girls that force me to eat out all the time...(referring to bad food) I figure she would be a good thing!
So, she asked me if she could run with me at night. I said sure. So, i drove to her house, she is about 10mins away. We started the jog and after about 30mins i could tell she was getting tired and we stopped for a min and walked. We went to a water fountain, she got some water, then started a slow jog again after we were rested. (PREPARE YOURSELF) Everything was fine, but about 6mins later she said she was cramping a little, so she wanted to walk. I was fine with it, we already jogged a good 30mins, nothing wrong with walking and talking. So, we were walking slow for about 15mins and having an awesome conversation, then all of a sudden she says: "Oh, my stomach hurts bad, i feel like i'm going to poop or something!!!" I was thinking to myself, ummm, what?? So, she bends over instantly and actually starts pooping in the street! It just happened, through her shorts, disgusting/embarassing! I handled it very well, i asked if she was ok and she kept saying how embarassed she was and how she felt like crying. I told her their was nothing to be embarrased about and not to get upset about it. I cheered her up, we walked back and i let her go inside to her parents and sister...I told her to say that we parted ways, and i didn't see it happen. To save her embarassment...
Ok, so ****? I can't really figure out how this can happen to someone. I'm going to give you a brief summary of the things i know she ate. I know she had sushi, about 2 hours or less prior to the jog. I thought maybe that could have been it. Also, i know she is taking these 7 day diet pills or something. Maybe that caused it? Although, if it was the pills, you would think it would have happened before. It's not like her first day taking them was today...
I'm not sure how to handle this, because i know when i talk to her tomorrow she is going to be upset and embarassed. I mean, i have never heard of this...This was our 2nd date, lol...I know she thinks i'm gone, but i don't think i should just not date her because of this. Although, if that happened to her, do you think she may have other weird problems? For instance, if we were sexual she would pee or something...I mean, i don't know if i could handle all that, lol...I also want to make sure this isn't something that will happen often, because i don't know if i could deal with that...What could it be?
So, what do you all think? Give her another chance, or just move on because it was gross and who knows what could be wrong...
----------------
http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=243484
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Ha, ha, that's funny Red Sox. I just think that it's wrong that women, especially fine looking women, would ever crap. Women are just supposed to pee and smell good. Never crap! I just can't picture a fine looking woman taking a dump, lol.
lmfao. so true man... so true..