JHL88

ive been in since april of 2008. today i found out i got orders to korea for a year tour. i just recently found out that my GF of over 2 years is pregnant with twins. so the question is what are my options? i was told i could turn down the orders but i wouldn't be able to re-enlist or be promoted if thats so could they stick me with the same orders again? palace chase was another thought but i guess i would have to turn down the orders anyway to do that. its something to think about especially the way the economy is. my girlfriend said that if i go to korea we wouldn't be together anymore. do i have any more options guys? im going to talk to the shop chief in the morning but i wanted to see if anyone has similar experiences

Coleman_WS6

What is your job buddy? Maintneance? I'm Fuel Systems.

Anyways... But damn man thats harsh for her to say. You could look into Palace Chasing possibly into a ART job would be a good choice. I would love to get out of active duty and go ART but it's hard to get one.

Compg

If your a first term airman still then you can turn them down without any issues. Now they might turn around and hit you with them again and then your screwed. If your a career airman then yeah your kinda boned. If she is pregnant with your kid and says that if you go to Korea for 1 yr she will leave you, then you might want to reevaluate that relationship anyway.
Tate

Chrisingermany

Just go and take your mid-tour when she is due. Taking a chance but at least you can get base of preference after Korea.

VinR1

iTrader: (17)

so... unless my math is way off... you've been in for three years but with this girl for two. And, she started dating/seeing/sleeping with you knowing full well you were in the military and she now says if you follow orders, she'll leave you and take your kid(s)... thats pretty messed up

barkerracing59

Ok thats harsh but like every one said if she said its me or you going to korea then i would seriously have a think yeah it sucks to be gone that long but its just like the army and how they deploy for a year but only come home for a month in the span of 6. There is options if your first term you can turn them down nothing will happen you have that right but update your dream sheet so that you will not get hit with them again. Thats what it all goes off of is your dream sheet, so if your not a first term then your kinda screwed you cant reenlist and no promtion so you better look at your options to get out either art or full time gaurd.

Camaro Junky

Wow! Well I know if you turn them down they will probably wait and just send you new ones. I work at the place where these numbers and orders are created, so if you want I can make a call and ask what will happen if you turn them down generally speaking. So I need to know if you are a 1st term Airmen or not....

jmurray87

iTrader: (1)

That is truly screwed up on her part, Pretty sure I would have ended it there if it were me.

Not sure if its the same anymore but don't you get to come home for a visit halfway though the deployment?

jiggler

like everyone else said she seems a little "confused" to say the least. I think you need to make a decision on if you are ever going to have a future with her and if your going to make the air force a career. You should tell her your doing this for your kids and to have a better future. I think shes just a little scared and afarid about you leaving for that long.
ALso does you girlfriend work at all and how much does she make?

JHL88

NICE im fuel systems too. where you stationed at im at shaw unfortunately

according to outbound i can't turn them down because it wasn't on my dream sheet. i am a first term amn btw

she is due when i leave...


well heres a long story short. she's having twins and in the military herself were both stationed at shaw im a SrA shes a staff. our relationship has been real rocky in the past and FINALLY getting a lot better now because she knew what kind of person i was. frankly speaking i dont trust myself at osan and i know that she will leave me if i go... she should have left me over a year ago. i planned on getting out after my enlistment is up but since she got pregnant it has changed everything. i want to be there for my kids and i dont plan on getting married anytime soon. if i go to korea come back and NOT get stationed at shaw ill never get to see my kids. i think my only move left is palace chase, i would think i stand a good chance of getting it i have 0 blemishes on my record i have a firewall 5 epr and i have no problems with anyone. i don't want to leave her she is the best thing to ever happen to me

JHL88

yea she called outbound and asked about it (shes in the military too) they said that since osan wasn't on my dream sheet (non voluntary) i have to go. it sucks because the only way out of Shaw is korea like 10 people from our shop just got hit with orders and im 1 out of 2 that didn't have korea listed as a pcs preference. if you read the post above ^ sums up my situation for the most part. ive known 2 people to turn korea orders down and got hit with them again like 3 months later...

Camaro Junky

If you don't mind me asking, What are you going to do then?

JHL88

well on monday im going to tell my shop chief i would like to put in for palace chase. i was thinking about getting out after my enlistment is up anyway. i know that the economy sucks right now but im very confident ill find a job on the outside but regardless we'll still have a steady income from her being a staff im not sure how much the AF will give extra for dependents. i dont want my kids growing up in a broken home wondering why their father isnt there.

babydeuce

iTrader: (24)

Do you have the retain-ability on your current enlistment to go to Korea? If you refuse to get the retain-ability, you will not go, but your career is over. Good luck with palace chase, your approval is at the convenience of the government, so you are not guaranteed to get it, especially with a pending assignment.

While I respect your commitment to your future children, the position that this woman is putting you in is extremely unhealthy. If she is giving you an ultimatum knowing damn well you are contracted to the government now, just imagine what she will do later in the relationship. You may throw away your career for something that will probably just happen later down the road anyway. Sorry to be harsh, but reality is a bitch.

BTW, I just came back from Korea, I had a F'ing blast, I would go back in a heartbeat, and I have a wife and 2 kids....

Jack

Coleman_WS6

I'm stationed at Moody, unfortunatly. A-10 primary, C-130's and HH-60's as well.

Personally the way I look at it is this... Do you honestly and truly see yourself spending your life with this woman? She has put you in a hell of a situation, its uncalled for especially with her being in the military herself. My advice is this... Kids are the most important thing, your right on that... But your career is up there as well. Being Fuel Systems, theres no future in this job on the outside world... ZERO. Take a good long hard look in the mirror. Is she worth giving your entire career up for especially with the way the economy is?

Good luck with the Palace Chase! There is a AFI just for that, can't remember the number off my head. But I would look at it first before you apply because if my memory serves me right, you are ineligible if you have PCS orders for overseas, but do not hold me to that. It's been a while since I read them.

barkerracing59

ok thats even worse she is in the military and is saying that its even worse you would be able to get back to shaw more than likely as you will have bop coming out of there.

I know it suck saying that but you can be there for your kids in more than being there physically what happens if this goes down you get out then she says nah this aint working leaves you and says you cant see the kids, you have no job no income and no kids then thats even worse.

If you cant trust yourelf going there your not too inlove with this girl your just trying to be there for your kids and you can be even if you do split. I never knew my dad and never will I dont even know what he looks like yeah that sucked but my grandfather and the rest of my family raised me pretty good. You will be there for them if you say you will then be there for them in any way you can if she decides that you and her arent ment to be.