Boyce - do NOT try this
06-12-2006, 08:26 AM
#1
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Boyce - do NOT try this > THE CURTAIN RODS
>
> She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates, and
> suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her
> things.
>
> On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful
> dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music,
> and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of
> chardonnay.
>
> When she had finished, she went into each and every room and stuffed
> half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all of
> the curtain rods.
>
> She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
>
> When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for
> the first few days. Then, slowly, the house began to smell. They tried
> everything: cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents were checked
> for dead rodents, carpets were steam cleaned, and air fresheners were hung
> everywhere!
>
> Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which
> they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to
> replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked. People stopped
> coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house.
> The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and
> decided to move.
>
> A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not
> find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and, eventually, even
> the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to
> borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
>
> The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told
> her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she
> missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce
> settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
>
> Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a
> price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if
> she were to sign the papers that very day.
>
> She agreed, and, within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork. A
> week later, the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the
> moving company pack everything to take to their new home.....including the
> curtain rods.
I just love a happy ending, don't you?
(thanks for the joke Linda)
>
> She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates, and
> suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her
> things.
>
> On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful
> dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music,
> and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of
> chardonnay.
>
> When she had finished, she went into each and every room and stuffed
> half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all of
> the curtain rods.
>
> She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
>
> When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for
> the first few days. Then, slowly, the house began to smell. They tried
> everything: cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents were checked
> for dead rodents, carpets were steam cleaned, and air fresheners were hung
> everywhere!
>
> Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which
> they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to
> replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked. People stopped
> coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house.
> The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and
> decided to move.
>
> A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not
> find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and, eventually, even
> the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to
> borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
>
> The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told
> her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she
> missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce
> settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
>
> Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a
> price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if
> she were to sign the papers that very day.
>
> She agreed, and, within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork. A
> week later, the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the
> moving company pack everything to take to their new home.....including the
> curtain rods.
I just love a happy ending, don't you?
(thanks for the joke Linda) 
06-12-2006, 11:12 PM
#6
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Issaquah, Wa.
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That aint no fairy tail,...and it isnt the worst one Ive heard by a long shot, best advise from an old guy,...............pick a good one and keep your pants zipped up,.........no ****! 
