new job drug test

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Old 02-14-2009, 05:20 PM
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Just use a wizinator, duh
Old 02-14-2009, 05:29 PM
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I know two accountants that work at Deloitte. They smoke week almost every day, and have both worked there for 5 years or more. They fretted about getting a drug test and quit for a few months, and they never had one for their internships, or for their hire.
What is it about you accountants? I know a few of them, and i swear they all smoke weed constantly. Is the job that boring?
Old 02-14-2009, 05:58 PM
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Its accounting. How fun does that sound? I'll be working tax. We all know how fun personal taxes are, imagine doing similar work looking for loopholes among volumes of tax code

But hey, its a reliable job that pays off the harder you work and the better you get at it. I just think of it as doing my part to fight socialism in the US. Plus I get to help companies save $$$ that can be put back into the workers and perpetually stimulate the economy.

BTW, when they take hair samples for testing (usually associated with big time gov't work) they rip out a patch of hair to test follicles.
Old 02-14-2009, 07:15 PM
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Originally Posted by aggiez28
sahave every hair off your body before you go in
Finger and toe nails can also be tested and as a last resort DNA is always going to be available.

My company does randoms but in 5 years I haven't gone yet. It's funny though because the only hispanic guy in the front office has been tagged twice in 3 months. Even random computer generated lists stereotype!
Old 02-14-2009, 07:44 PM
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Originally Posted by THE BLACK WIDOW
Not so lucky if they do a hair test
If not a habitual smoker than when testing for THC hair is just as accurate as pee,but if other drugs where taken all that goes out the window.Im just sayin
Old 02-14-2009, 07:52 PM
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Originally Posted by DoingBadThingsIsFun
Just use a wizinator, duh
They were forced to close down. There are quite a few other options out there though. Hit up your local head shop.
Old 02-14-2009, 09:21 PM
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I've already got some detox but need to know when I have to take the ****.

Any experiences on how long you know before they hand you the cup?
Old 02-15-2009, 12:21 AM
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If you bought some detox, it should have instructions.

Usually it will tell you to drink X amount of water a couple hours before, then drink the detox followed by more water. It will make you **** a couple times then you go take the test.
Old 02-15-2009, 12:24 AM
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Just depends on how many people are in there. Sometimes you have to wait in line, sometimes you don't. BTW I used a detox, it was the 420. I failed on it...I would get the biggest baddest one they have, regardless what they say. I stopped for a month before too. I smoked dro everyday for like 6 years before though...
Old 02-15-2009, 12:33 AM
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If you're worried about detox kits not living up to their promise, there are synthetic alternatives. They're undetectable and guaranteed to pass, as long as no one is watching you and you follow the directions. I think the only people who get watched are those on parole/etc.
Old 02-15-2009, 12:46 AM
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Originally Posted by Morbid
If you're worried about detox kits not living up to their promise, there are synthetic alternatives. They're undetectable and guaranteed to pass, as long as no one is watching you and you follow the directions. I think the only people who get watched are those on parole/etc.
Aggreed. The only thing I can say about that is my buddy who had the wisonator and they made him pull up his shirt and it was sticking out a bit. Getting some real **** from someone and tieing a string and hanging it from the rim of your undies/boxers works good. Try to have it between your legs or close to your ***** after warming it with hand warmers that you can buy from walmart..

I got real **** for sale, lol....
Old 02-15-2009, 12:46 AM
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Drink water constantly, until you are full and continue to drink. The farther out and more you drink the better. Point is not to flush the THC out of your system becase it will be in your fat cells for a long time, but to push water through your body faster then your kidneys can pump impurities into it. Basically, you are pissing pure water.

DeTox **** doesn't work. Just a gimmic.

Get some "uristats" which are for bladder infection (find them in the grocery store near the woman stuff like monistat). They turn your **** orange, so don't take them within 24 hrs within the test. They will strip the impurities out of the wall of your bladder.

Dip your left hand pinkey&ring fingers in bleach and let them dry. When you are pissing into the cup, **** on those fingers as it drips into the cup.

You can also go the surtose method, but it's gonna make you vomit. It's a gelatin sold in the grocery store, it coats your bladder/small intestine with gelatin and the liquid you consume doesn't get exposed to the THC. Mix it up with some warm water and drink it.

If it's a hair test, your screwed.

I've used these methods back in the day to pass after smoking 36 hrs before a test. And I used to be a daily toker, so I was completely saturated with THC. Ususally the first 3 combined to make me feel confident.
Old 02-15-2009, 12:56 AM
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Originally Posted by purple_lean
Drink water constantly, until you are full and continue to drink. The farther out and more you drink the better. Point is not to flush the THC out of your system becase it will be in your fat cells for a long time, but to push water through your body faster then your kidneys can pump impurities into it. Basically, you are pissing pure water.

DeTox **** doesn't work. Just a gimmic.

Get some "uristats" which are for bladder infection (find them in the grocery store near the woman stuff like monistat). They turn your **** orange, so don't take them within 24 hrs within the test. They will strip the impurities out of the wall of your bladder.

Dip your left hand pinkey&ring fingers in bleach and let them dry. When you are pissing into the cup, **** on those fingers as it drips into the cup.

You can also go the surtose method, but it's gonna make you vomit. It's a gelatin sold in the grocery store, it coats your bladder/small intestine with gelatin and the liquid you consume doesn't get exposed to the THC. Mix it up with some warm water and drink it.

If it's a hair test, your screwed.

I've used these methods back in the day to pass after smoking 36 hrs before a test. And I used to be a daily toker, so I was completely saturated with THC. Ususally the first 3 combined to make me feel confident.
I aggree with everything you just said just never wanted to type it, lol.

Also take a lot of vitamins, vitamin b...That way you don't **** straight water, now they will say your **** was deluted...At least you don't fail, you get to retest. They give you like 3 trys...if you delute the third time your fucked.

Drinking a lot of water and getting a sweet suite works well. You just wanna stop sweating a few days before because you don't want your body breaking down the THC like crazy because like I said before they test for the **** that breaks it down not the actual THC

BTW, I'm not sure if this is gonna get locked or turned into a sticky, lol.....
Old 02-15-2009, 01:20 PM
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In high school, my friends overloaded niacin to 'burn' out before PO meetings. In college, everyone used the gelatin masking trick coupled with eating 2 multivitamins to dilute but balance the pH and specific gravity. For work, they stepped it up and bought detox from head shops (and usually quit too). I've never done anything and still passed those at-home tests.

Only issue with these tricks is they all knew when they got the cup in-hand. I'm pretty sure I can pass w/o doing anything but it would suck to fail for guessing wrong. Should I just down some detox the first day? I'm not going through a day with a pissbag strapped to my sack for nothing.
Old 02-15-2009, 01:27 PM
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ask for a Whizzinator at a local smoke shop......I have personally used this 3 times....works flawlessly
Old 02-15-2009, 02:24 PM
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smoke some crack
Old 02-15-2009, 03:11 PM
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They have a 7 day detox program if you have that long, it will get you clean. It's a day by day program..
Old 02-15-2009, 03:34 PM
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Im a Contractor for FEDEX Ground and Deliver to all of those companies. Pretty good friends with them all, Ill ask what there Drug Test policies are...... STOP SMOKING the **** lol .. its not worth not getting a job or losing one because you still wanna be in college.
Old 02-15-2009, 10:53 PM
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the pill doesnt work, i know cuz i failed back in the day lol. the one from gnc. a dumbass i know just lost his job cuz they did a hair test on him. he workED in the oilfield service, he shaved his head and bought some 60 dollar shampoo so they took an armpit hair lmao.
Old 02-15-2009, 11:26 PM
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Originally Posted by SSilverSSurfer
smoke some crack
lol, then the green will be the least of his worries.


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