Dear Diary-Just moved to Texas
07-07-2011, 08:16 AM
#1
Dear Diary-Just moved to Texas Dear Diary, I just moved to Texas! Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not
a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car.
What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun
worshipper.
June 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and
rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn for me. Another
scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to
this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting used to
the heat is taking longer than I expected.
July 15th:
Fell asleep by the community pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my
body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson
though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.
July 20th:
I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By
the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita had died and swollen up to
the size of a shopping bag, then popped like a water balloon. The car now
smells like Kibbles and *****. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in
this heat. Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes again.
July 25th:
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's hot as
hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged
$200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
July 30th:
Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house and I
can't even go inside. Lomita is the lucky one. Why did I ever come here?
Aug. 4th:
Its 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500
and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid state.
Aug. 8th:
If another wise *** cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to
strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling
over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!!
Aug. 9th:
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I sat on the
seats in the car, I thought my *** was on fire. My skin melted to the seat.
I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and
*** . . . Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ***, and baked cat.
Aug 10th:
The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny. Hot
and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do shitfor 2 damn months and
the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain
in this damn state? Water rationing will be next, so my $1700 worth of
cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this
damn heat.
Aug. 14th:
Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 today. Cactus’ are dead. Forgot to
crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The installer
came to fix it and guess what he asked me??? "Hot enough for you today?" My
sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Freaking Texas. What
kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here?? Will write later to
let you know how the trial goes…
a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car.
What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun
worshipper.
June 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and
rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn for me. Another
scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to
this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting used to
the heat is taking longer than I expected.
July 15th:
Fell asleep by the community pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my
body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson
though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.
July 20th:
I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By
the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita had died and swollen up to
the size of a shopping bag, then popped like a water balloon. The car now
smells like Kibbles and *****. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in
this heat. Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes again.
July 25th:
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's hot as
hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged
$200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
July 30th:
Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house and I
can't even go inside. Lomita is the lucky one. Why did I ever come here?
Aug. 4th:
Its 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500
and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid state.
Aug. 8th:
If another wise *** cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to
strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling
over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!!
Aug. 9th:
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I sat on the
seats in the car, I thought my *** was on fire. My skin melted to the seat.
I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and
*** . . . Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ***, and baked cat.
Aug 10th:
The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny. Hot
and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do shitfor 2 damn months and
the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain
in this damn state? Water rationing will be next, so my $1700 worth of
cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this
damn heat.
Aug. 14th:
Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 today. Cactus’ are dead. Forgot to
crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The installer
came to fix it and guess what he asked me??? "Hot enough for you today?" My
sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Freaking Texas. What
kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here?? Will write later to
let you know how the trial goes…
lmao 
07-07-2011, 12:26 PM
#6
TECH Enthusiast
Anybody who wants to complain about texas heat needs to go live in Memphis for a summer. 100+ degree days with 90% humidity. You stand a good chance of heat stroke walking to the mailbox.
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07-07-2011, 02:20 PM
#8
TECH Enthusiast
I went to houston for a week in June and didnt have a problem. Its been awhile since ive been in heat I felt the need to complain about.
07-09-2011, 08:11 AM
#9
On The Tree
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Dear Diary, I just moved to Texas! Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not
a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car.
What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun
worshipper.
June 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and
rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn for me. Another
scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to
this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting used to
the heat is taking longer than I expected.
July 15th:
Fell asleep by the community pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my
body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson
though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.
July 20th:
I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By
the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita had died and swollen up to
the size of a shopping bag, then popped like a water balloon. The car now
smells like Kibbles and *****. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in
this heat. Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes again.
July 25th:
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's hot as
hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged
$200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
July 30th:
Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house and I
can't even go inside. Lomita is the lucky one. Why did I ever come here?
Aug. 4th:
Its 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500
and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid state.
Aug. 8th:
If another wise *** cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to
strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling
over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!!
Aug. 9th:
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I sat on the
seats in the car, I thought my *** was on fire. My skin melted to the seat.
I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and
*** . . . Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ***, and baked cat.
Aug 10th:
The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny. Hot
and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do shitfor 2 damn months and
the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain
in this damn state? Water rationing will be next, so my $1700 worth of
cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this
damn heat.
Aug. 14th:
Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 today. Cactus’ are dead. Forgot to
crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The installer
came to fix it and guess what he asked me??? "Hot enough for you today?" My
sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Freaking Texas. What
kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here?? Will write later to
let you know how the trial goes…
a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car.
What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a sun
worshipper.
June 30th:
Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and
rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn for me. Another
scorcher today, but I love it here.
July 10th:
The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to
this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting used to
the heat is taking longer than I expected.
July 15th:
Fell asleep by the community pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my
body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson
though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.
July 20th:
I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By
the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita had died and swollen up to
the size of a shopping bag, then popped like a water balloon. The car now
smells like Kibbles and *****. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in
this heat. Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes again.
July 25th:
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's hot as
hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged
$200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.
July 30th:
Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house and I
can't even go inside. Lomita is the lucky one. Why did I ever come here?
Aug. 4th:
Its 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500
and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid state.
Aug. 8th:
If another wise *** cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to
strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling
over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!!
Aug. 9th:
Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I sat on the
seats in the car, I thought my *** was on fire. My skin melted to the seat.
I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and
*** . . . Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ***, and baked cat.
Aug 10th:
The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny. Hot
and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do shitfor 2 damn months and
the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain
in this damn state? Water rationing will be next, so my $1700 worth of
cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this
damn heat.
Aug. 14th:
Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 today. Cactus’ are dead. Forgot to
crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The installer
came to fix it and guess what he asked me??? "Hot enough for you today?" My
sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Freaking Texas. What
kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here?? Will write later to
let you know how the trial goes…
Refer to June 2011
Hot as Hell
Texas, come on vacation leave on probation LOL!
I love the great state of texas!!!!!!!!
